5 Lessons For My Child

Being a parent is a scary thing. I want my daughter to live her life on her own terms and explore all great things in the world, but at the same time, I feel very protective of her and don't want her to get harmed by any malign things in the world. 

There are things that should be taught to kids in their childhood to better prepare them to face the world. I want to sit her down and teach her these lessons but I don't want to be the boring parent who keeps giving lectures. 

Instead of bombarding her with countless advice, I have narrowed it down to 5 life lessons. I feel if she learns these 5 things, she will do fine in the world, and I won't have to worry about her too much. For the next 10 years, my efforts will be to teach my daughter the following 5 lessons because it's not a one day job. It needs to be woven into her DNA with time and patience. 

1. Learn to Say No:

To be able to say NO is a superpower and I want my child to have this superpower. Sometimes people take advantage of your politeness and non confrontational nature. They make you say yes to things that benefit them, and harm you. So learn to be firm and assertive and don't say yes when you actually want to say no. It applies to people who would ask you to come to Bible studies, people who would make you subscribe for magazines you don't need, to much more severe cases like people forcing you to take drugs.  Just say NO. It's beautiful.  

2. Be Self-Assured:

I learned much later in life what gaslighting is and how people would go out of their way to make you doubt yourself. I don't want my daughter to fall prey to such cowardly action. I want her to stay firm on her beliefs about herself, and trust in her abilities. I am going to teach her to identify such manipulative people and learn to fight them. I am going to teach her to be self-assured even in the worst of situations. 

3. Take a Pause:

The best way to avoid making wrong decisions is to take a pause before making any decision and think- what's the worst thing that can happen because of this decision? And will I be able to handle the consequences? Is it worth the trouble? If you are ready to have unprotected sex with a guy, take a pause and think - what's the worst outcome of this? - I might get an incurable STD. Is it worth it? Can I handle the consequences? You can save yourself a lot of misery if you do this. But it takes a hell lot of strength to pause at the right moment. That's the skill I am going to teach her. 

4. Know Your Priorities:

I am not saying you will always find bad people in life. You will get good friends, people who make you happy. But you have to know your priority. Stay on your plan. Don't let anyone be more important in your life than yourself. You should be the most important person in your life. What is more important for you? Partying with your good friends or studying for your exams? I am not saying you can't do both but don't sway from your priorities. 

5. Never Give Up:

Life is not fair. You will not get what you deserve right away. Keep at it till you achieve it. You need to know when to quit, but it's important to not give up on your purpose. Nothing will come easy to you. Know that failures are equally important as success. Failure teaches you more lessons. You have to keep fighting for it, fight till your last speck of strength. But never say- I give up because I can't do it. There's always a way. When you have exhausted all possibilities, remember this - You haven't. 

It's easy to list down these life lessons, but I don't know yet what's the best way to imbibe them into her psyche. I will keep doing what I can and hope for the best. 

If you are a parent and you have your list of life lessons you want your child to learn, mention in the comments.